Thursday, April 1, 2010

Don't Call Me I'll Call You

Thomas Jefferson was one cool dude. Along with being one of the founding fathers of the greatest country in the world, he was also our 3rd president, the principle author of the Declaration of Independence, and our country's 1st Secretary of State. Pretty impressive, right ladies? Yeah I thought so too.

Well it turns out the ladies were even impressed back then and aside from being all those important professions mentioned above, Thomas Jefferson was indeed a ladies' man, and apparently a prominent one at that. In the wake of the recent Tiger Woods debacle, I was left wondering how the most famous athlete on the planet, one that's worth over a billion dollars, can get away with having multiple mistresses without being seen once by a fan, reporter, anyone who recognized him standing next to a woman that's not his wife. Regardless of who he had working with him, or who he paid off, that's an incredible feat in today's world.

Long ago, if Thomas Jefferson wanted to "holla" at one of his "shorties" (sorry my teammates everyday dialect is rubbing off on me) he would have had to send a very racy, and privately worded, telegram, or walk up to her and (gasp!) engage in conversation himself.

Today, Tiger could have communicated with his "bitties" (damn teammates) in multiple ways without leaving a trace of evidence or being suspected in anyway.

My point is in today's world, privacy is way undervalued and under-appreciated. Try this on for size...any of you familiar with the movie, "He's Just Not That Into You"? If so you'll recognize this quote, "I had this guy leave me a voice mail at work, so I called him at home, and then he e-mailed me to my Blackberry, so I texted to his cell, and now you just have to go around checking all these different portals just to get rejected by seven different technologies."

Now I'm not trying to be like Tiger, but in my personal opinion social networking and means of communication has gotten way out of hand, but still I cannot seem to stop. Wanna chat? Get ready. If you can't reach me at home try calling...or texting my cell, I always have it with me. Hell, if you want we can sext...I'm a sexting virgin, but I'm always looking for something new. If you can't do that, leave a voice mail, I'll get it eventually. If I know you professionally (professors), e-mail me. Of course I do have a personal e-mail account as well, multiple actually, but those are for signing up for the other social networking sites because they are required. Are you just a friend? Did I go to school with you? Do we know each other casually? Request to add me as a friend on facebook. I'll get it. Or Twitter. I tweet a lot, you can follow me and I can follow you. It'll be a blast. My latest tweet, "To the guy that discovered milk...what the hell was he doing with that cow?" Not into those things like twitter or facebook? (seriously who doesn't have a facebook)We can Skype. I just got a web cam, we can video chat, it's actually pretty cool once you figure it out and oh yeah I completely forgot...snail mail. I have a place called home, its got an address, just send me a letter...I love letters.

You can take a deep breath now.

And the funny thing is, with me being a college student, and pretty savvy with technology, if you "hit me up" (my teammates again, sorry) on any of these but the regular mail and my house phone, they come directly to my cell phone. All those means of communication, trapped into one device, that my Dad would say, "is constantly attached to my hip."

Cyberspace is an ever growing community. World Wide Web really does mean worldwide, and just not including ours. There's a whole universe out there of a different dimension that I bet all of you reading this are a part of. (Don't try to lie because I mean, you are reading this blog in some form of web browser.)

My only question is when will it end? The answer....probably never.


I guess I will take the time to give a shout out to all the managers of the basketball team this year. They help me make sense out of this world and I appreciate that...oh yea and they also rebounded a ton of shots of mine...thanks guys.

I also want to take this time to have a moment of silence for Chris Althoff's finger. Because as far as we can tell, his finger will never be the same.

He did this while helping me set up the shooting machine we have in the gym. This is a picture of it today, but it happened like two months ago. Sorry Chris!


  1. Claudia WashburnApril 1, 2010 at 3:44 PM

    Enjoyable as always. Keep writing Tyler, it just keeps getting better. Are you considering a career as a writer (in addition to bball of course)? You should...

  2. Do you have a girlfriend?

  3. huh. Tyler your composition skills are great, care to give me a few? I am learning to be a High School Lit teacher, maybe I'll be like a female version of Choate. Scary. Anyways, its been a while, "hit me up" on facebook if you can figure out who this is. ya?